And yeah, probably PPD. I took two xanax last night and I feel incredibly different today. I am still very, very sad, and still angry but the anger is not so consuming and I am not having thoughts of hurting myself like I have been for the last week (gee - that wasn't a sign I needed help - idiot).
So - now for the really big discussion - do we or don't we? Now that I know all the other horrible ways a baby can die, do I want to risk another bolt of lightning?
Now that I have the added problem of antidepressants that could cause problems I don't know what the hell to do.