Wednesday, June 2, 2010

GAH!!

Lots more crazy over here.

I switched ADs this week (STUPID, STUPID, STUPID) and I'm really feeling it. I had two fights about really stupid shit tonight with Sean and couldn't tolerate Kira for even 10 minutes. How shitty is that? I want a baby so bad and I can't even appreciate what I have. I know I am in a shit storm of grief, depression, and anxiety right now, but still.

I've been trying to comment today and google keeps eating them. Is that just me? I give up. If you haven't heard from me, I'm sorry. I'll try again tomorrow. I can't think of much to say anyway - I don't think anyone wants to hear from Eeyore today anyway.

Sorry - I just can't get out of this well today. I think I will just sleep down here and see what tomorrow brings.

OH - and I had my O day wrong. I am testing way too early. But that means I didn't time sex well. Dammit.

6 comments:

  1. I totally feel this way some days. Its terrible. Im hoping we both have better dayz amiga. Hugs to you.

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  2. Ugh. Sleep is quite the cure. I'll be here when you are ready to tell us something. Shoot, I hope tomorrow is better for you.

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  3. being cranky or snappy does not make you a bad person or an ungrateful mother. You are a person with heavy emotional stuff going on. I have lots of experience with opt and finding the right window (you knew 3 years of IF would bw handy), let me know if I can help at all.
    hang in there

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  4. I hope you have a nice rest, and the little things go better tomorrow...

    How are you calculating o-day?

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  5. Some days are like this. Don't beat yourself up. You're only human and you are still a hurt grieving mother. Just because you're having a rough day does not mean you don't appreciate your daughter. You do appreciate her and that's part of the reason you want another baby so you can shower your next child with just as much love and appreciation.

    Be gentle with yourself.

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  6. For those that wondered - here is my less than stellar chart. There was some sex (I hate baby dancing) after O day, I just can't remember when.
    http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/2f2aae

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