Seriously, and I am not even drunk.
Every time I am feeling really down I log on and someone says something so loving and supportive that I feel better. I still feel like I need to be alone but I decided to skip work and stay home by myself and that helped. I am seriously considering cutting my hours back at work so I can do this more often. Maybe I will in a month or two when my back is better and I'm not spending $125 a week on physical therapy.
Anyway - something important I've been meaning to say.
I am trying to get pregnant again. I am scared shitless about it. I will need lots of support whether or not it works. HOWEVER (the caps means pay attention and take this to heart) if it is painful for you to read about a pregnancy - DON'T. I will absolutely NOT be upset or hurt or disappointed if you stop reading if I get pregnant. I PROMISE that I understand completely and will not judge anyone for not wanting to hear me talking about morning sickness (pleeeeaaaase, universe!). I know there are lots of women who are still in the terrible grip of IF, or trying to heal from a loss with no live baby yet. I know for many of them, they cannot bear to be around pregnancy or babies or anything related. I hurt for them all the time and wish so much I could put that baby in their arms. I would never, never want something I said to add to their pain. So if you drop off, don't worry. I will still think of you and check on your blog to see how you are doing. And I will be the very first to yell in joy when you get that baby you deserve. I hope you will understand that I have to write about my (pleeeeaaaase, universe!) pregnancy because I will be CRAZY.
And man, I love you guys! *snif*